{"id":160,"date":"2025-09-16T16:54:00","date_gmt":"2025-09-16T16:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/good-worldwide.go-vip.net\/upworthy\/2025\/09\/16\/stay-at-home-mom-shares-frustrating-difference-ex1\/"},"modified":"2025-09-16T16:54:00","modified_gmt":"2025-09-16T16:54:00","slug":"stay-at-home-mom-shares-frustrating-difference-ex1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goodinc.com\/qa-upworthy\/2025\/09\/16\/stay-at-home-mom-shares-frustrating-difference-ex1\/","title":{"rendered":"Mom shares the frustrating difference between stay-at-home and working parents"},"content":{"rendered":"

We all need a pat on the back every once in a while, someone to let us know we’re doing a good job. There are many ways for people with careers <\/a>to feel validated. You can get a raise, a promotion, a great review<\/u><\/a> from your manager, or a professional award<\/a>. You can also be someone respected in your profession and a mentor to younger people<\/a> entering your field. These forms of validation help someone feel valuable and accomplished and are all tangible in some way. You can say, “I\u2019m now the vice president of manufacturing,” “I won the Excellence in Sales Award,” or “I have a larger number on my paycheck.<\/u><\/a>“<\/p>

Syd, a stay-at-home mom named @eclectichomeschooling <\/u><\/a>on TikTok, shared that, unfortunately, moms who work in the home have a hard time finding that same feeling of validation. <\/p>

\"stay-at-home
How do you measure success as a stay-at-home mom? Giphy<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure> <\/p>

\u201cSomething that I think that a lot of people don\u2019t realize about being a stay-at-home mom, whether you are a homeschool mom or your kids are young and you\u2019re staying home with them during those years, is that there\u2019s no measurement of success. There\u2019s no metric,\u201d she begins her video.<\/p>

\u201cThere\u2019s no one saying, \u2018Congratulations, you have been promoted; you are the top of the top of this skill.\u2019 None of that,\u201d she continued. There is no award for an outstanding stay-at-home mom, and there is no manager to give her a review or promotion.
<\/p>

She says that being a good mother to her kids \u201cfeels good\u201d and \u201cmakes us happy\u201d but argues that it isn\u2019t something you can \u201chold\u201d or \u201cwrite down.\u201d<\/p>\n

\nhttps:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@eclectichomeschooling\/video\/7416518643237784878\n<\/div><\/figure>\n


<\/p>

\u201cWe\u2019re going on eight years of not being able to measure [success],\u201d she continued. \u201cI think that that\u2019s a thing that nobody really talks about or that we don\u2019t really get to talk about with each other. Your partner goes to work: they get promoted, they get raises, they complete their work for the day and they … get to be like, \u2018OK, I succeeded.\u2019 But my [work] is just constant, all of the time, and there\u2019s no metric for it.\u201d<\/p>

The dishes that Syd cleans will be dirty the next day. The laundry she folds on Monday will be worn on Tuesday and rewashed on Friday.<\/p>

\"motherhood,
Work done in theu00a0home is never Photo credit: Canva<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure> <\/p>

Although Syd has yet to find a solution to this problem, she sees other ways to get the validation she craves. \u201cIt\u2019s hard, especially because a lot of us don\u2019t prioritize hobbies for ourselves. That\u2019s a great place for us to find success or a feeling of accomplishment,\u201d she said.<\/p>

Syd\u2019s video struck a chord with many stay-at-home mothers feeling the same way.<\/p>

A commenter named Leigh noted that the need for external validation comes from the corporate culture in which Americans are raised. \u201cOn my best days, it is interesting to notice how tied we are to corporate-style success. On my worst, it is inescapably crushing,\u201d she wrote in the most popular comment.<\/p>\n

\n

*stay at home moms*
\u201cI don\u2019t feel like I do enough\u201d

*wakes up with kids
*makes 3 meals a day plus snacks
*laundry
*dishes
*shopping
*cleaning
*teaching
*planning

\u201cBecause I don\u2019t bring home money\u201d

Mom what you are doing is so important! Keep it up!<\/p>— Your Mom (@modernmomese) October 6, 2020<\/a><\/blockquote>